Read the following out loud. An overly dramatic voice is helpful, and your imagination can supply the frenetic video footage: FOLLOW the HARROWING SAGA of the FLUKINGIJIGiGJER’S CHICKENS as they RAISE SEVEN CHICKS to ADULTHOOD. WILL THEY SURVIVE? WHAT about the FLOCK of BIZARRE DUCKS SPOTTED among PEACEFUL NEIGHBORHOOD HENS? WHY did the HENS SUDDENLY …

Well, here are some of the newest crop: seven Buff Orpington chicks purchased the other day at the local co-op. (Wait, there’s a pun in there somewhere …) Are they hens? Roosters? We don’t know, and probably won’t until fall, when they’re mostly grown up. Then, may the best rooster win. The rest will end …

Yes, it’s a pun. Not as good as some, of course; but perhaps no pun ever is. This egg is  a surprise to us since our little pullet (young hen) laid this egg on the same day that Honey attacked her and ripped out some of her feathers. (Rough day, huh?) We were surprised that …

This is about a week’s haul in the winter—2 dozen eggs, give or take. (I can’t see through Abby’s hand.) In springtime, it will be about one day’s worth. We will have so many eggs floating around that we’ll have to find a way to freeze them, or something. Can you freeze eggs? Jess took …

Wow, that sounds sinister, doesn’t it? It sounds like the name is not so much spoken as intoned: “The Killing Cooooonnnnnne,” like a tool of unspeakable torture. Actually it’s a quick and merciful way to dispatch a bird, and I got mine at Home Depot. Or more accurately, I got the sheet metal for it …

To Absalom’s legs, that is. The ones with the spurs on them. Absalom met his Maker on Saturday morning. Here’s the fixin’s for rooster soup, just before Jessica bagged them to put in the freezer: It was not a pleasant end. I’m really sorry, Absalom, but I didn’t know what I was doing. By the …

Well, I’m back. It’s been a fantabulous holiday; 10 days off for the price of four. I spent every day working and checking things off my list (not a big believer in sittin’ around), but the biggest news (for me) is that I finished my first novel and completed the first draft of my second. …

Well, there he is. It’s not the greatest chicken picture in the history of Western Civilization, but it gives you an idea. What we should have done is have the chicks come up alongside him for a size comparison—we’re pretty sure Tubaloth and Fang are banties, since they’re half grown and only the size of …

Remember the two chicks that hatched in, oh, September? Here they are. One is named Tubaloth and the other Fang, but only the kids know which is which. The chicks are growing up. Emma snapped this picture the other day and it’s a little fuzzy, but you can see that they’re quite a bit larger …

Here I am putting insulation on the chicken coop roof. (The long gimcrack in the foreground is the feeder.)With my ravishing good looks in coveralls and high-fashion cap, I’m ready for the cover of Vogue. I heard once that ducks are cold-tolerant because they’re descended from wild ducks that live in cold wildlands; and chickens …