By the way, for all those I may have offended with my unflattering portait of television, I am sorry only that I didn’t show more tact. Some of you may actually like television. But my true opinion of the medium is that it’s offensive, unclean, obnoxious, contemptible, odious, invidious, revolting, distasteful, low, foul, corrupt, bad, indecent, nasty, dirty, filthy, sickening, malignant, disgusting, lousy, putrid, vile, impure, coarse, ribald, loathsome, stinking, icky, rotten, shameful, ugly, vulgar, and wicked.

And that’s just the commercials.

Meanwhile, we’ve had to discontinue our internet connection via Verizon Wireless. It worked fine to start with, but we lost the signal for a day or two and when I was finally able to reconnect my connection was sssssssssslllllllllllllllllllllllooooooooooooooowwwww, even slower than our dial up. And that’s saying something. (How slow is our dial up? You could eat dinner while a page was loading.)

So we’ve succombed to satellite internet by WildBlue. (They gave us a better deal than their competitor.)It’s the only option for us out here. Satellite is a unique technology: it seems to be nearly universally despised (cost, speed, unreliability), but out here nearly universally used. Now I know why.

And as for all the ickiness I so gleefully condemned above? Isn’t the Internet more slimy than television? Three answers: 1) Not possible. 2) We strictly govern our kids’ use, Jess only uses Gmail and Facebook, and I never have time for Internet anyway. 3) We use NetNanny.